We'll Always Have Each Other
Loud voices filled the air, some cheering, some just talking loudly to be heard over all the other chatter. The smell of roasting meat and fresh baked bread was everywhere and the room was brightly lit. But all Thor cared about was the metal tankard in his hand full of mead. Well that and the endless pain that stabbed at his chest. Every breath he took seemed to push a hard shard of reality into him that burned and ached. He sat alone at a rough wooden table in the darkest corner of the room and while it probably would have done him some good to watch the others in the room, he couldn't bring himself to do it.
The god of thunder had returned to Asgard when the love of his life, Jane, had left him. He gave up everything for her. His world, his family, his birthright, any of his other dreams. None of it had seemed important except being in her arms. The blonde had gone to Midgard to be with her and after only a year, she had broken it off. The only reason she gave was that she needed "space". And not the extraterrestrial kind. He wasn't so stupid he couldn't read between the lines. It meant she didn't enjoy his company any more. And that was a blow he wasn't used to. Everyone loved being around him. Except the woman he loved it seemed.
What made this whole situation worst was the fact it happened two weeks ago. He had dragged himself back here and found the first tavern he could bury himself under a layer of alcohol in. Thor had more than enough money that no one bothered him. He hadn't told any of his friends or his father that he was back. A rough, brown cowl was kept over his head so no one would recognize him. He wasn't ready to face his failures yet. That reminded him of how he'd let his brother die. Guilt pierced him and made tears come to his eyes. He'd lost the most important person in his life and he'd done it for her. If she had never been infected with the Aether there would still have been the threat of the Dark Elves, but he wouldn't have had to make Loki go with him and trick them. The god of mischief would still be alive, safe and sound in his prison cell. Thor missed him more than ever.
A strange sound that was a cross between hissing and sparking caught his attention and he looked up through mead soaked eyes and hazily tried to focus. A dark figure wrapped in a cloak stood on the other side of the room, staring at him. Something about it seemed familiar and then the person looked up sharply and he saw the flash of green that made his heat skip. He had to be hallucinating because they were suddenly gone again. He sat a little stunned, trying to process it then decided it was just his guilty feelings manifesting themselves on top of his drunkeness.
Thor sat there for another couple hours and when the building started to spin, he knew he better get to his rented room before he fell on his ass and attracted too much attention. Wobbling unsteadily, he made his way to the staircase where the figure had been standing at the bottom and couldn't help but look around in case he missed something. There was no one or nothing there. Of course. Loki was dead and no amount of drinking was going to change that.
It was more difficult than he remembered to get up the stairs. The steps kept moving when he went to place his foot down. When he finally made it to the top, he wanted to cheer at his victory. Instead a big, silly grin came over him and he stumbled toward his door. It took a few tries before he managed the handle and practically tripped inside. He did remember to shut it behind him, which wasn't always the case when he got like this.
The god looked around the area he occupied. There was a small bed covered in furs to his right against the wall and a tiny square table by the window. Only one wooden chair was pushed next to it. A large fur rug was on the middle of the floor and there was a chest at the foot of the bed for his things. All he had with him was clothes and money. And Mjolnir of course. There was a wood door to the left and he headed that way, pushing it open so hard it slammed against the wall. This was his washroom. A crude tub and toilet were in here with a small sink. Thor pulled his dick out to take a piss and listened to the hot liquid hit the cold water. Sighing happily as he shook it off and tucked it back in, he turned around and started toward the bed. Even in this state, his warrior's instincts kicked in and he turned toward the window and saw a tall, thin figure covered completely in a black cloak sitting in the chair.
"What do you want?" he asked, not sure he could do anything to protect himself at this point.
"Not even a greeting after all this time?"
The god's mind reeled at the silky voice that hit his ears. Disbelief flooded him and he couldn't move or think.
"You...you're not real."
There was a deep chuckle that he was sure he'd never hear again.
"More real than you know. Tell me brother, is she really worth giving up the rest of your life for? To spend it in this dirty hole in the wall?"
Thor gripped his head and stumbled backward. This had to be his concious tormenting him. He'd seen Loki die, held him as he took his last breath. Only his love for Jane had kept him going and now that was gone too. He had nothing. Nothing except this waith that was sure to disappear when he was sober in the morning. He heard the rustling of clothes and looked up to see the figure stand. How...how did he hear it? Illusions didn't make noise did they? Maybe he was imagining that too.
All he could do was stare as the dark form came closer to him. He backed up until he was pressed against the door. The blonde god was terrified of what he was going to see. Would he be half skeletal or rotten? He wouldn't put it past his mind to throw that insult at him, to try and show him what he'd done to the beautiful man he'd taken for granted his whole life. He couldn't do it. As brave as everyone thought he was, Thor couldn't look. He fell to his knees and held his face in his hands, sobbing.
"I'm sorry Loki. I'm so sorry."
The sound of boots clicked on the wood after leaving the rug and stopped right in front of him. Maybe it wasn't his brother in front of him, but he wanted to let it know that he was truly repentant of all the choices he'd made. Every last one of them. Especially one in particular from their childhood. That day had haunted him forever but it was never brought up again. They had pretended it never happened but now he knew that was the beginning of his lifetime of mistakes.
"You expect me to forgive you so easily?" a cold voice asked him.
No, he couldn't expect that. But he remembered and images flashed before his eyes. Sunlight poured through leaves as they played hide and seek in the forest. Thor was looking for his younger brother, they had just reached their teens and were at the age where they could still play freely even though manhood loomed around the corner. As long as Loki didn't cheat, he could always find him. Eventually he saw a flicker of shadow behind the large trunk of a tree and he stealthily approached, springing on the smaller boy in an instant and trapping him against the bark. A cry of surprise had left his brother and grinned at him triumphantly.
"How do you always find me?" he groused.
He didn't know where it came from but his answer had been something he normally never would have said. He didn't know it at the time but it reflected what was truly in his heart.
"Because I can feel you. In here," he pressed his brother's hand to his chest and Loki's eyes had gone wide.
Thor had nodded and was about to release the other boy when thin arms wrapped around his neck and he felt the soft lips pressed against his. Without thinking, he had pushed the other boy off and gave him a look of disgust.
"What's wrong with you? We're brothers."
He had seen the tears in his eyes and the way his bottom lip quivered as he tried not to cry, but the blonde hadn't cared. He just stormed away, wondering what was wrong with Loki. After that day things had never been the same. They drifted apart and the god of thunder made friends he spent all his time with. From what he could tell his brother spent a lot of time alone in the library. Years later when they were both older, he realized he'd been wrong to treat him so badly, but it was too late. There was no way he could repair the damage between them, but he'd tried. He started to drag Loki with him and his friends and to be the best big brother he could. Even though he wished more and more he'd accepted the gesture he'd been given that day.
Thor's head shook no and he couldn't remove his hands from his face. He was terrified of what he was going to see. The sound of a scoff came from above him.
"Look at you, the brave magnificent Odinson, snivelling on the ground at your dead brother's feet."
He felt strong arms grab him under his arms and lift him up so he was standing. Now he knew this couldn't be a halucination. It was impossible that he could be moved by an illusion. His hands fell away in shock and he found himself staring into Loki's face. He looked just the way he'd always remembered, complete with the condescending stare.
"But how?" he stuttered.
"Does it matter?"
And at that moment it didn't. Somehow he'd been given a second chance and his brother returned to him. Though now he knew he was never really his blood brother but an adopted sibling. Thor surprised him by grabbing him in the biggest hug he'd ever given in his life. The slender body in his embrace was stiff and he felt the small hands pushing at him.
"Let me go, you drunken smelly oaf," Loki growled at him.
"No," he gasped, tears flowing from his eyes.
"I'll never let you go again. I'm sorry, I was wrong. About everything."
He pushed the hood back to make sure he wasn't wrong, but he would know the other man anywhere. He felt it in his chest. The blonde wasn't disappointed to see the raven hair fall out and spill down his shoulders. His hands went up to cup the sides of Loki's face as he stared into the brillant green of his eyes. He went with his heart instead of his mind for the first time in forever and kissed the beautiful man in front of him. This time his brother pushed him away.
"How dare you?" he spat and strode away from him.
Thor was confused and his inebriated state didn't help.
"But I thought..."
"You thought what?" the other man asked him heatedly.
"That I forgot how you rejected me all those years ago? Do you really think I'm ready to fall into your arms because you need someone to warm your bed now that your human has deemed you unworthy?"
It was true, he didn't deserve Loki. In fact, all he did deserve was to rot in this dive as his brother had pointed out when he'd first arrived. The blonde slumped back against the door.
"Then why are you here?"
He could see how the other man took a minute to compose himself before answering.
"You have nothing left and I came to offer you an option. While you may not be the brightest person to live, you are an asset to have as an ally. Join me Thor. I rule over Asgard now and I could use your help."
His mind had trouble understanding what he was saying.
"How do you rule? Where is father?"
A guarded look crossed the delicate features of the other man.
"He has fallen into the Odinsleep. It seems to be permanent this time and mother supports my reign."
Thor felt there was more to this than he was being told and it was time for him to make a hard decision. Did it matter? If his brother was lying to him, did he have any other choices? Maybe he should just do something that he never had before and trust him. He straightened himself and walked over to the moon kissed beauty.
"Tell me the truth and I will follow you anywhere."
He was given a skeptical look.
"What if you don't like the truth?"
The blonde put his hands on the shoulders of the other man and gazed at him sincerely.
"I don't care. I belong to you now. I have ruined everything in my life and I no longer want to destroy those around me."
So many emotions crossed the face in front of him, he couldn't name them. But he could see the amazement that was underlying everything else. The green eyes darted over him and it seemed like Loki was speechless this time.
"I.." he started, then had to stop and lick his lips.
"I put Odin into his sleep. I wanted the throne and took it."
His brother flinched as if waiting for him to get angry and yell at him. But he didn't.
'I don't care. You could have killed him, couldn't you? But you left him alive. I know you have a good heart in here and I will find a way to get to it."
He slipped one hand down to touch Loki's bosom to show him where his goodness lay. Again, he had made the other man speechless.
"I love you Loki," he whispered and kissed him again.
Maybe it was the shock or maybe he finally believed him but his brother kissed him back hungrily. Years of longing passed between them in hard, passionate embraces. They didn't stop until neither of them could breathe and they stayed together, their chests heaving.
"Are you really mine?" the younger god asked.
"Everything is yours, I swear."
For the first time since he could remember, Loki smiled and he found a new purpose in his life. He was going to use everything he could to make that smile stay on his face forever.
"No matter what happens, we'll always have each other."
Loki nodded in agreement and this time he initiated the kiss. Thor gave him everything he should have so long ago and held him close.
"Never be afraid to kiss me ever again."
Tears of happiness came to his brother's eyes.